Just me...

Friends...

Sat, 16 Sep 2006 02:18:25 GMT

I know that throughout your lifetime that people will come and go. And some times it is sad to think that this is how it is. But you will always remember the friends that held so many memories. And to lose them as a friend it is sad. And while others it is o.k. Why...it is just that life has a way of bringing people into you life for a certain reason. But when a friend that means so much to you drifts away....it is sad. And to get a moment to have them in your life again...like it once was...that is what we all look forward to. Once that happens...you should grab and try to hold unto the friendship that once was. The closeness of the friendship. Even for a little while you should have the chance. But than again life always seem to have a way to put you in a sort of pace that no matter what...you are always moving ahead. I know that if things were different everyone would still be at the same moment in life where nothing bad ever happened. But than we would never see that their is always good times ahead.
No matter what happens....I think everyone should travel a mile in the other person shoes...see what life is all about...see where their life has led them to and know that no matter how far apart you are to someone....you always hold a place in their hearts..whether if it is only for a moment or throughout your life.
Everyone has a handful of good friends that no matter what happens...once you see them...it seems like no time has gone by and you start up where you left off. And those are the friends that will see you through the hard times in your life and will be there for you the cry on their should. They are the friends that will bring you happiness and at the end....they will always give you a call out of the blue to say hello.
They are some of the precious people in your life that you should not take for granted. And should be told that you love them and miss them. Who knows....what tomorrow will bring...Some people never get to have a chance to say...I am glad I have you in my life. Life is too short and we should always tell what we are thinking...because tomorrow we might not get a chance.
But than again...I am just in a weird mood and have not told people that mean a lot to me that I am thankful they are in my life.

Some things to think about...

Sun, 03 Sep 2006 03:05:04 GMT

Have you ever sat down and took a stock of your life. Like have you down things you once dreamed about. I think that when you are young....that is when you should live. Kids have the option to go playing in the rain and dance til their feet just drop. And that is the greatest thing in the world. But I think as you get older and look things for what they are...the magic just has faded from it. I do not know when it has but I think they we just get so busy with our life that we let the magic fade. I am not saying that we don't have things in our lives now that filled that void....but it was easier than to let go. To experience life and not care what the outcome was.
Sometimes I miss that. But life always moves forward and looking back at things you should done...well....it only brings you down. If you are always looking back, than you will miss what is right in front of your face. Whether it is the great times with family or just a smile from a stranger letting you know that you are alive.
I think people know a days take that for granted. They live there lives thinking about how things are messed up and not realizing the miracle they have in their lives. I just wish that everyone would take time to smell the roses or to drink your coffee while the sun is rising. To get a tiny hug from a child or to tell a complete stranger hi. To just make someone else's day better. I guess that we are beyond that phase in our lives when we no longer can do that. Every min. now seems to be with thoughts of something that we are pushing ourselves towards or just regretting the pass.
Who knows....maybe one day someone will think about these same thoughts and realize that it is not too late to change something. Whether they just want to change there lives and makes it a must to see the sunrise once a week. Or once a day tell a stranger hi.
Who knows...but I know that I want my kids to know that it is a world that is filled with many emotions...some will be the best while other will be hell..but in the end...that they always can find happiness.

let it be....

Sat, 12 Aug 2006 03:45:30 GMT

I think everyone looks back at their childhood and wonder what it would be like to go back there. Just for a little time to feel what we felt. The magic of our first kiss...the innocence of believing in things that we know now don't exist. To play in the rain and not worry about what people thought. to laugh at nothing at all and cry like there is no tomorrow.
I look at my kids and think how I wish that they could experience a lot of what I did. And at the same time as much as I want them to feel and to experience these things...I just don't know if I can let them do the things. Seems like now a days it is just too scary out there. And I know they parents when I was growing up must have thought the same things. But I see if only where I am coming from I want them to live life to the fullest but I also want to protect them and make sure that at the end of the day...I know that they are safe.
I know that I can not decide how they will choose to live there life...Only influence them to be great, good and kind....but I just wish that I could make them stay my innocent little babies. And I know that I can not stop the aging but at times I think they are just growing up so quick.
Funny....my kids are not even in school...but I just feel like it was only yesterday that I held them in my arms for the first time and now they won't even fit in my arms anymore.
Who knows what tomorrow will bring....but I hope that they will live life and know that at times you will fall down and get hurt...but I also hope that they know that I will always be there for them...whether they want the help or not. Who knows. Maybe this world will get better for our kids...and maybe things are never gonna change. And if this is the way the world is to be...I just hope that my kids will still stand up for their beliefs and know that nothing is wrong in it.
I just want them to know that there is still kindness in this world and to know that to be loved for all that you are and all that you stand for is the best thing in the world.
I also hope that my kids know that I will make mistakes and that I make at times fall down and will not know what I am doing. But I also hope that my kids will know that no matter what I do...they are the most precious things to me in this world. They are what makes me wake up in the morning and know that someone is there and making sure that everyone knows what a miracle is. Because they are my little miracles and I am thankful everyday for them.

not much...

Fri, 23 Jun 2006 03:25:41 GMT

I really do not know what to say. I guess I am just as bored as anyone can be. I love my life. Don't get me wrong. But at times I wish that I could be this person that did not have to take care of everyone around me. I love my kids and they are my life. And truthfully...I would not know what to do if I ever lost them. But I wonder some time where I would be and who I would be if I never had my first child.
She is the most beautiful little girl ever. But I wonder who I would have become. But I guess it is too late for wondering. I know that I am a mom, a sister and a wife. That wondering is just a waste of time and I have to wake up every morning to start my day out. To teach my kids what is right and what is wrong.
I know that if I start living in just maybes and regret that I will became my mothers daughter. That I will be just like her and my kids one day will grow to hate me. So I rant and I rave. Just to let it all out of me. So that I will wake up in the morning and know that I have it good. I have what most people want all there lives. And I have it right in front of me. So why am I complaining to whoever.
I do not want to grow up and watch my kids growing up with me. I want to be a person in their lives that they come towards when life just seems like it is not fair. That they will come to me with questions and I can give them the right answers. I want my kids to be able to experience all life has to offer and not be scared to take chances.
I want the best for them...even if it scared me. Even if I know that there choices will take them half way around the world or just a few towns over. I want them to be as happy as they can be but also know that I love them with all my heart.
At times I feel like I can not handle the pressure of being a mom. But all they have to do is give me a hugh hug and I feel like this is what I was meant to do. To be a mom and know that one day my kids will turned out to be prefect people and be happy.
I guess all moms worry about what if's and whatever not. But I guess that all it takes for us to know we are in the right place is to have tiny arms around our necks telling us that we are the greatest. To hear our baby say mama for the first time and to see our little mirables take small tiny steps which we know that to them the are the greatest milestones.
That those tiny steps will lead to walking....than to running and one day, when you don't even expect it. They will be telling you goodbye and walking out the door to begin their own lives. Which I dread and also excited to see who they will become but scared to know that time does go by quick and it does not stop for no one.

faded Memories....

Wed, 10 May 2006 02:27:50 GMT

How come it seems that when you think that you have pretty much gotten to a point where a death of a love one stops haunting your waking moments. To the point where you pretty much have dealt with the loss. And you hear a song, catch a smell or hear something and it brings it all back to you. Every painful thing. Every tear that you have cried. Everything.
At times I just can not let go of my dad. I just want him to be with me as much as I did when I was seven years old and on his shoulders. I want to hear him make his jokes. Which I always thougth were stupid. Now I miss them most of all. I miss him and me talking at night about nothing at all. There is so much things that I wish I could say to him but I can't.
I miss him more each day and I honestly don't think you ever stop missing a love you. I think that you just push what you feel everyday in the back of your mind and just don't take any time to feel what you hide.
I just don't know how to move on as much as I should. He was my best friend. He was the one person in my life that truly loved me more than anyone could love a person. I miss him more each day. And I just wish that I could have my dad back in my life. I don't know why he had to die the way he did. I do not know what the answer to why my dad had to get sick. I do not know why god had to take him away. And at times I just want to scream and cry. But than I think back on him knowing that he would be o.k. That he was happy with his life and everything that happened.

Pulling my hair out...

Wed, 03 May 2006 19:53:17 GMT

O.k...I watch some little boys today. And they are little cutie. But when they come over, Gavin goes crazy. He is here and there like a little rocket. Which in a way is cute. But today he push me over the edge. He got quiet and started to play by himself with something. Which he does that sometimes. But today....omg....he came in front of me and started to play with this brown thing. Which than I got worried thinking he might choke on it. So I got up to see what he was playing with and he ran from me. Had to chase him down to see what he was playing with. And omg...I bout threw up. He has a bug. That boy was eating it....and what is bad...is it did not have a head. OMG
I about had a heart attack there. What is up with little boys and bugs. Maddy would have screamed and came running to me. But gavin..he eats them. What am I going to do with that boy. OMG
So that is the excitment for my day.

not much....

Mon, 06 Mar 2006 12:44:32 GMT

Well, where can I start. Not much has been going on lately. Just doign the same stuff. gavin turns 1 tomorrow. So I am in tears over that. The whole idea of them getting older and no longer being the baby that I onced held in my arms. It is such a great and horrible feeling. I want them to always be the baby that I could hold and protect. Where I knew what they were doing all the time. But I also want them to grow older and have fun and see new thing each day. Just I am just being me. Going on about thing that I wish could happen and knowing that thing must change.
I know.....I am such a dork. But than again...that is just me. But other than that.....not much is going on over here. Just hating the weather...one day it is so warm and than the next day, Close up your window and turn up the heat. I am so hoping the spring comes soon. But I can't complain much. One of my friends like in Alaska. So I know she must be freezing her butt off.
But that is the only thing going on. I know...I am rambling over here.

Things We'd Never Know without Cartoons

Thu, 16 Feb 2006 18:00:15 GMT

1. BEWARE anvils are everywhere. {Heck, nobody knew what an anvil was
until Wile E. Coyote.}
2. TNT, or any other explosive item as easy to find and use.
3. ACME supplies all.
4. It's possible to be shot with rifle as many times as possible
without being remotely injured.
5. One minute, you can have a crutch, a cast, a sling, and a bandaged
head, the next you're as good as new, fighting your enemy as always.
6. You can disintegrate, but put yourself back together in time to save
the day.
7. You can light a match off anything, even yourself.
8. Everything, from rabbits to infants, can and will talk.
9. It's possible to walk in mid-air, until you realize that you're
walking in mid-air.
10. It's completely legal not to wear pants.
11. Violence never results in death.
12. Mice love cheese and rabbits love carrots.
13. Holding up signs is more fun than talking.
14. Mail service is amazing. {Send away for something, and you get it
within the next 5 to 10 seconds instead of 5 to 10 days. If only...}
15. Monsters do, do not, do do not, do, do not exist.
16. Your enemies are almost never smarter than you are.
17. As long as you change into a costume with tights and a cape, no one
will recognize you. {Half-mask with pointy ears optional}
18. Cannons do no harm.
19. There are no set laws for hunting seasons.
20. It's totally cool to have a closet full of the exact same outfit.

History of Valentine Day

Tue, 14 Feb 2006 11:16:55 GMT

Legend has it that Valentine was a priest who served during third century Rome. There was an Emperor at that time by the name of Claudius II. Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those that were married. With this thought in mind he outlawed marriage for young men in hopes of building a stronger military base. Supposedly, Valentine, decided this decree just wasn't fair and chose to marry young couples secretly. When Emperor Claudius II found out about Valentine's actions he had him put to death.

Another legend has it that Valentine was an imprisoned man who fell in love with his jailor's daughter. Before he was put to death he sent the first 'valentine' himself when he wrote her a letter and signed it 'Your Valentine', words still used on cards today.

Perhaps we'll never know the true identity and story behind the man named St. Valentine, but this much is for sure...February has been the month to celebrate love for a long time, dating clear back to the Middle Ages. In fact, Valentines ranks second only to Christmas in number of greeting cards sent.

The week....aaaahhhh

Tue, 14 Feb 2006 11:06:35 GMT

Well, V-Day and so far...it is only 6 here. So not much going on. But gonna be a wild week.
My little girl b-day party and also this day. Seem like b-day season and holiday season sneak
up on me. Too much and too soon. We have Maddie's, V-day, Gavin's than all the ones after
March....so gonna be busy as who knows what. But they are my babies....and I love to see
them happy.
But other than that. Not much is going on. One of my best friends may be coming down to see
me. And I am hoping that she does. Have not seen her since I was pregnant with my frist child.
And I miss her. I know...I am such a dork...but than again...I never claimed to be normal.
Well...I guess I will go.
TTFN

bored...

Fri, 27 Jan 2006 09:45:27 GMT

Just sitting here not doing much. But than again it is too early for me to be up. Like sleeping in but my honey woke me up this morning. With him waking up at 3 it kills the relationship. Always working than coming home to sleep. Seems like I never have any time with him. And my little one is killing me with his teeth. At night it kills me to see him cry like he does. My little girl is coming home this weekend. I can't wait to see her.
But that is about it. Not much going on right now. Just tired and can't go to sleep.

New Here...

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 18:37:36 GMT

Not really sure what to say or to write. Kinf of new at this thing. So I guess I can begin off with saying that last night I got no sleep at all. My little boy is getting another tooth. So I am the one that is up at night trying to rock him to sleep or whatever I can do to get him to sleep. Thinking about putting him on ebay. J/K
And my little girl should be coming back from her daddy's this weekend. So I am thrilled about that. Can't wait to see her when she gets home.
And for me and my hunny. I barely see him 4 hours a day on the week days. Seems like he is always tired when he gets home. Drives me up the wall. But than again....I love him.
I know....does not sound like an interesting life so far. But to me...I love it.